prejudicial treatment

Lately my "Malignant Spots"(hereafter known as my MS) have been getting a bit sniffy. We had a little chat the other day.

"Oh fairsCaPe, what's wrong, why do you hate us so, what did we do?"they boo hoo-ed.

"Don't be lame!", says I. "You've metastasized!"

"Oh no, we never, not us..." they assured me.

"Really?" says I "Then would you mind explaining what you are doing in my LUNG ?"

"Oh, that.", says MS "We was on vacation. You know, just travelin' around... just a harmless little excursion..."

"Harmless? And how was I supposed to breathe properly while you set up housekeeping in there? You're going to have to go!"

"Oh boo hoo...sniff sniff... we can't go back...we only got a one way ticket... besides, we like it here...there's lots of oxygen...and we can hear things better when you talk and sing... you do have such a lovely voice fairsCaPe..."

"You're nothing but a bunch of nonpaying tenants as far as I'm concerned." says I.

"You know, hating us is like hating yourself...like hating the shape of your nose or the color of your skin." says MS.

"I could get a nose job and a tan, no problem." says I. "Listen, I've had it with you all...you'd better pack up your junk... the port goes in next week and then I start chemo and you'll all be kicked to the curb, out in the snow, by xmas eve."

I said this last bit in my most evil Landlord voice.

I've dealt with difficult tenants before...it's always wise to get professional help.